Why do people allow themselves to get stuck in a rut? Why do people remain in that rut doing the same thing, day in and day out despite knowing they are adding to their unhappiness. Why do they ignore the life-preserver that is being thrown to them that can open the door to health, wealth and happiness? When given suggestions on small steps they can take to make life better, they think – yes that is a good idea but I don’t have the time or the energy to do that. Or, that might work for someone who doesn’t have kids or doesn’t work killer hours or doesn’t have debt up to their eyeballs.
Have you ever been stuck? Stuck in a rut? Stuck in a rut so deep that you couldn’t see any options? Stuck in a rut so deep that you couldn’t see any options and couldn’t hear any advice from family and friends on how to make things better?
I would venture to guess that we have all been there.
Are you are in a rut right now? Do you feel like you have no choice but to follow the same daily grind that pays the bills so you can keep a roof over your head, food on your table and clothes on your back. Do you feel frozen and powerless to make the big and little changes that would allow you to get back into your little blue kayak in the middle of the lake (AKA your happy place)? Does your daily routine maintain your stress level just ¼ inch short of blowing your top?
Chances are you have people in your life who have been trying to throw you a life-preserver that can open the door to increased happiness. The problem is when we get stuck in a rut so deep that we can’t see any options and the brain is unable to register the life-preserver as something that can help. It simply registers it as 1 more thing to handle, to dodge, to categorize, and to organize. We don’t see that life-preserver as something that can make life better. Hell chances are we don’t see it at all!
I have 2 life preservers to throw you today. Two tips that can help give you a bit of breathing room so perhaps you can find your way out of your rut and back onto a path that allows you to make decisions that will improve your health, wealth and happiness. These life preservers are big, they are orange and they are right in front of you. Promise me you will grab hold and not let go. Promise?
Tip #1: Take 10 minutes every single day to close your eyes and be
silent quiet. Yes I know life is stressful and every single minute is already maxed out. But do it anyway. 10 minutes. Sometimes our stress levels are so high we could be drowning amid a hundred life preservers, struggling to breathe and fighting the waves of the pissed off ocean. Perhaps in that 10 minutes you might realize that the water is only 3 foot deep and it is ok to put your feet down to rest and to breathe. It is in that 10 minutes that one day soon you will start feeling a nudge and that nudge will become a push. And that push will give you the energy and the insight to find your paddle, to pick it up, to right your kayak and to begin to take control of your life.
Tip #2 Identify the 1 or 2 people who needlessly add stress to your life. I’m not talking about your spouse or your kids or your boss – I am talking baby steps for goodness sakes! I am talking about Debbie the Downer who complains from the minute she walks into the office until the minute she leaves. I am talking about Ned the Neighbor who sucks the life out of you by telling you every detail of his life. I am talking about the people who bring you down, use your energy, take up space and add nothing to your life. STOP allowing them to monopolize your time and your energy. When Debbie the Downer enters the room, smile and get the hell out of there. Don’t waste a lot of energy figuring out how to get away, just do it. Pretend you have to make a phone call or go to the bathroom. Some people just reek of negativity and bad energy and you can not afford to get sucked into their downward spiral.
These were the first 2 life preservers I caught in my climb out of my own great BIG rut. Remember Change a Little, Change a Lot? Sometimes small changes can have a really big impact. By distancing myself from people like Debbie the Downer and Ned the Neighbor I allowed positive energy to build up within myself that gave me room to breathe. It became easier to not get wrapped up in negative energy and conversations that only dampened my outlook. During my quiet time I learned to silence the negative self talk in my head. I learned to listen and respond to the AHA moments of insight that opened the door to options that have led to a better life.
I know you don’t have 10 minutes. I know you don’t want to be rude to Debbie and Ned. I know you have no energy. I know, I know, I know!!!!
Now stop making excuses that keep you living in the rut and drowning in the ocean. There are 2 life-preservers at your fingertips. Grab them – use them to make 2 small changes that will help you point your kayak in the right direction. There are at least 98 more life preservers that are within reach. Some you may find here in My Little Blue Kayak Blog. Some you will find from talking to your family and friends. Some you may find from reading books. Some you will find from that 10 minutes of quiet time you promised to take every day…