Good health is incredibly important to me and it is my dream for all of us to grow old gracefully and with boundless energy. The way I see it, the daily decisions we make now will help to determine how healthy we will be as we age. In addition to writing about my own health journey, here at My Little Blue Kayak, I work as a health care professional, read books, blogs and listen to a variety of relevant podcasts. Last year, I became certified as a Health Coach through the National Society of Health Coaches and am exploring the possibilities of how I will use this certification to support others to improve their health thru lifestyle changes.
I work with a lot of people who suffer from one or more chronic diseases and by the time I meet them, their health is a major issue and will likely get worse, if they do not make lifestyle changes. It is not just my patients though, that live with chronic illness. I have family members and close friends that I love who deal with the pressures of obesity, diabetes, arthritis, heart disease and stroke. I am willing to bet that you know and love people who also live with a chronic illness. What are they one step away from?
One of my favorite patients is in her early 60’s and considers herself old. In many ways she is old. She needs a rolling walker to get around her home, a wheelchair to go on errands, can’t climb a flight of stairs, takes multiple medications and gets out of breath walking in from the car. She is overweight, has diabetes and respiratory disease. The reality is; she is not alone.
Six in ten adults in the US have a chronic disease and four in ten have two or more.
Center for Disease Control
Some people are relatively unaware of the dangers of their poor health or see it as completely outside of their control. They can’t make any changes to their health because they don’t recognize that change is necessary much less possible. As a health professional, I can provide education, lecture, talk until I am blue in the face but I am not going to convince them to make any lifestyle changes. They are in the words of many experienced health coaches, “problem unaware”. People in this stage, do not need a cheerleader, they need to be left alone. Chances are they are not ready, willing or able to make meaningful changes at this time.
People at this stage are not ready for health coaching and will not benefit from health education. When I try to provide education on health related topics to someone who is unable or unwilling to see that they have the power to make positive changes; it tends to make them defensive, angry or results in them shutting down. This hurts the relationship and decreases the likelihood that they will come to me if the situation changes. Simply put, if I push at this stage, I risk alienating them and ruining any chance of helping in the future.
When someone is unaware that their health is a problem or unwilling to acknowledge this, it is not a health professionals responsibility to argue with them or to get them to see the situation differently. Change has to start from within and the first step is when someone acknowledges that they are concerned about their health. Once they do so, they are willing to talk about what that means, what they might be willing to change and how they might go about it.
At the stage of “problem unaware”, our role as a health care professional or concerned loved one is to listen, accept the person’s point of view and let them know should they change their mind in the future, we are available to support them make whatever health change they are interested in addressing.
If you are concerned about the health of a friend or a family member; I suggest you engage them in a conversation about their health to try to gauge how they feel about it. No judgments, no lectures, no education and absolutely no guilt. If they don’t acknowledge any problems or concerns; or are simply not contemplating dealing with their health at this time, leave them be, they are “problem unaware”. Simply let them know you love them and are willing to talk in the future should they change their mind.
When people are ready to engage in conversations about their health and to talk about their concerns, what they wish were different; they can begin to see change as possible. They begin to believe they can making small and big changes to help them reach their goals. The more they talk about change, the more willing they become to change. Pretty soon, all bets are off as to what they can accomplish! Now you can pick up your pom-poms, give them a shake and offer to help him/her in reaching a newly established health goal!
Choose Health!
Lake Girl
Excellent post and such a realistic approach to the issue. I sometimes find myself bemoaning that someone or other doesn’t do the necessary work to change their health issues. Makes good conversation; but, as you so aptly point out, fairly useless.
Thanks for some wise advice. Helps me set aside some worries and focus on the do-able.
Judy
People have to be ready to talk about change before they can actually make changes. If we try to force the issue, we jeopardize the relationship and that isn’t worth it! Thanks for reading!